Episode Guide




File Two Productions

Vague Rant Productions

Donkey Kong Universe
Lord Roger von Bloodshire

The son of a British fisherman and an Australian music teacher, Lord Roger von Bloodshire bounced back and forth between the two countries during his entire childhood. As such, he developed a taste for worldwide culture and especially its music. Upon adulthood, he established the self-named Bloodshire Recording. It was the 1980's, and as music videos were taking off, so did his business. His first major coup was signing famed record producer Sir Donny Q. Donderly, and this naturally followed with new pop star after new pop star dominating the airwaves, FM radiowaves, and cassette tracks.

As the '80s gave way to the '90s and the '90s gave way to the '00s, the well began to dry up. Bubblegum pop and boy bands were all the rage, and it was harder for Bloodshire Recording to compete. They stayed afloat, but only with "a pathetic string of one-hit wonders." What they needed was someone with staying power, "a modern Elvis if you will." Sir Donny believed he had found just this man in "Melungeon Fudge." Unfortunately, Melungeon Fudge was just entering a severe weekend cough syrup addiction.

After Bloodshire flew in all the way to the States to meet Melungeon himself, all went awry. Melungeon was out of his melon on the syrup, and so his friend Slick tried to cover for him by having Doctor Leon play the part. Bloodshire was fooled, which was unfortunate, since after experiencing Doctor Leon's tongue massaging the roof of his mouth (not to mentioin the cacaphony of Leon's own song, Spicy In Your Eye), Bloodshire stormed out and went straight back to the airport. Sir Donny committed suicide seconds later.

Bloodshire didn't bother to attend the funeral, deciding to devote his time in finding the actual modern-day Elvis.

Lord Roger von Bloodshire is portrayed by Zack Beseda.

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