Episode Guide




File Two Productions

Vague Rant Productions

Donkey Kong Universe
201: Guess Who's Coming To Dinner (Honkey Edition)

Original Airdate: January 23, 2006

Slick was spending some downtime in the break room of Silvan Summers Boxing when ring announcer Joey Bagwell interrupted him with some juicy office gossip. It turned out that Silvan's wife had run off with Mr. Epstein, the vice president of the company, following her discovering her husband in the sex swing with Lisa, the town harlot. This meant that Silvan was not only suddenly single, but looking for a new vice president! After Joey revealed to Slick what Silvan apparently looked for in the job (someone who was able to suck up), Slick believed the job could be his easily. Unfortunately during his fantasies, Silvan had come into the breakroom and Joey was seizing the oppurtunity for himself. As he began to invite Silvan over for dinner that night, Slick decided he needed to beat him to the punch (not that punch would be served as part of the meal). Taking a nearby computer keyboard, Slick whacked Joey in the back visciously and made the offer out-of-breath. Silvan accepted, which set off Slick's flights of fancy to an even greater degree.

Coming home to the apartment in the early evening, Slick caught Elvis napping while music television blared on the television. Waking him up, Slick voiced his displeasure that while he earned them money, Elvis spent his days not even trying to get singing gigs. Elvis defended his right to watch music videos, but Slick wasn't convinced. He didn't even understand how Elvis could listen to such overtly-Satanic tunes, as in the past he had displayed fears over demonic imagery. Elvis answered by rubbing his crotch (don't ask). Finally revealing that his boss would be coming over for dinner, Slick started making preparations. First, he would call Rent-a-Decor and order a dining room table. This proved to be difficult, since Elvis was determined to continue watching his devil music. Slick responded by smashing their television with a conviently-placed computer keyboard. Elvis was distraught, since the Satanapalooza concert that he had been excited to watch would be airing later that night. Slick couldn't have cared less.

With dinner in the oven (fresh flounder casserole) and oak leaf pie ingredients at the ready, Slick was confident that he could pull off an impressive enough meal to secure himself the job. "Kindly" asking Elvis to change into some nice clothes (apparently Slick believed that his ref shirt was the height of fashion), he then answered a knock to their door. It was the delivery man from Rent-a-Decor: Grom Corbis. Slick's progressive ways led him to be inititally charmed by Corbis' mental handicap, but this didn't last too long. Grom Corbis had brought a television tray instead of a dining room table! Slick was furious but signed for it anyway, and then as soon as Corbis was gone, Elvis returned from his bedroom wearing black eyeliner. He was now intent on lving the life of a death metal fan, despite picking the worst possible time to do so. Slick yelled at him (as he often did) and, since Elvis wouldn't change, he told him to stay in his room. Elvis regretfully complied, and just in the nick of time. The next knock at the door turned out to be SIlvan Summers.

Slick greeted Silvan, but already problems were becoming evident. Silvan volunteered himself to put his coat away, and Slick had to clumsily step in and do it himself so that Silvan wouldn't put it in Elvis' room and discover that his roommate was acting less than savory. While Silvan decided to watch some television on their set (which Slick had basically destroyed), Slick checked up on Elvis. He was busy headbanging to his CDs. At least he was content. Walking back out to the living room, Slick informed Silvan what they would be having for dinner. Silvan didn't find the menu all that appetizing, so he decided he would have to coke his brains out to properly prepare. This led to another incident where Silvan almost walked into Elvis' room (this time while looking for a bathroom), and Slick hurridly rushed in and rerouted him. Inside the bedroom, Elvis was now trying to conjure up evil spirits with his Candyland board. Elvis was an idiot.

Although he had deflected Silvan from finding out the truth about Elvis yet again, things still weren't going well for Slick: His casserole was burning. As he tended to it and realized that it was beyond salvation, another knock came at the door. It was Grom Corbis again, realizing that he had brought the wrong table. Before he could bring the correct one in, he saw Silvan and believed a party was going on. Grom Corbis is a party animal. Silvan was less than enamored with the delivery man's clumsiness, so Slick had no choice but to rely on Elvis' help in booting him out. Elvis was busy though... he was duct taping Diane Buttercup's mouth for a Satanic ritual. At that moment, Silvan was beginning to fear Corbis, and happened to run right in front of the open bedroom door. Slick screamed at him to get away. Silvan complied, but ran straight into the opening laundry area door, knocking it off its hinges. Grom Corbis was behind it, reminding us to always separate our whites and colors.

Slick peeked back in and saw that Richard Nixon was now standing over the bed with Elvis as they gleefully tore Diane's heart from her chest. Slick was horrified and stepped away, but was horrified once again that Silvan was nowhere to be found. Did he leave? No! He didn't leave! Grom Corbis had wanted to help with the pie, and decided to add his own special ingredient: Silvan Summers himself! Slick helped the impossibly-stuffed Silvan out of the pie, but it was too late to make a good impression. Silvan was furious and announced he was leaving, and so in a last desperate attempt Slick punched his boss square in the jaw. Corbis was dismayed to find that his pie was ruined and stabbed himself with a large kitchen knife. The fact that a man just knifed himself in his kitchen didn't seem to concern Slick so much as the unconscious Silvan, which was confirmed when he tended to him instead of Corbis.

Silvan was furious and nearly attacked Slick when Elvis came out of the bedroom, upset over all the noise. Silvan was pleased to see Elvis, who he fondly remembered from the Anderson Tyrone title bout, but wondered aloud what he was wearing. Slick decided to come clean and admit that Elvis worshiped Satan. This delighted Silvan, who promptly revealed that he too bowed at the Dark Lord's goat feet and was going to run home to watch Satanapalooza. Elvis was asked to come with, and then was bestowed with a new Silvan Summers Boxing title: Vice president. Slick was outraged that all of his hard work was for nothing, but it wouldn't have made a difference in his pursuit because, as it turned out, Mr. Epstein had been a Satanist too and that was the reason he had secured the position. Defeated but happy for his best friend, Slick was sorry that he had no food to offer the two men. This problem was solved with the sudden appearance of Satan, who had made delicious chicken tetrazini for his disciples. Hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hah!

Watch This Episode!


Banks Lee as Elvis
Greg Janda as S'Larik del Monte (Slick Monty)
Jeff Stebbins as Silvan Summers

Mark Moseley as Joey Bagwell
Matthew Muhl as Grom Corbis
Mariola Schmid as Diane Buttercup
Chad McCanna as Richard Nixon
Sam Respess as Satan
Jimmy McCoy as TV Announcer

Executive Producers .... Chad McCanna and Hyle Russell
Created by .... Hyle Russell and Chad McCanna
Faculty Advisor .... Phyllis Slocum
Director .... Chad McCanna
Head Writer .... Hyle Russell
Additional Writing .... Chad McCanna
Camera .... Chad McCanna
Boom Operator / PA .... Matt Gibson
Editor .... Chad McCanna
"A Friend at the End" Composed and Performed by .... Eric Lambert
Original Score .... Eric Lambert
Apartment Provided by .... CityParc Apartments

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